Let’s face it: Divorce is an emotional roller coaster. No matter how prepared you think you are, you will probably find that during your divorce process, you will face feelings you were not expecting to feel.
At McKINNON LEGAL, we have helped countless people end unhappy marriages and find their new beginning. We’ve become acquainted with some of the unexpected emotions that our clients encounter during divorce.
Even if you are fully confident that divorce was the correct move for you, you are still likely to feel regret. You might ask yourself, “What if things had been different?” Or “Could I have changed it if I worked a little harder?”
It is okay to feel regret and it does not mean that getting divorced was the wrong choice. A marriage is a difficult thing to lose. You would not have gotten married if you were not excited about making something good together.
You learn a lot about yourself during a divorce. In particular, you learn about your own resilience and strength. You may surprise yourself by feeling really proud of yourself. This feeling is completely warranted. The end of a marriage presents so many challenges, both practical and emotional. Proving to yourself that you can handle it is something to be proud of. You are awakening into a new you–an improved, strengthened self.
You might encounter an uneasy haunted feeling — not haunted by a ghost but haunted by memories. You may find that every place you go brings back a flood of memories. It is particularly strong in places where you and your spouse spent time together, but you might be surprised by some of the places you get this feeling. At a coffee shop in a far away town that you have only visited once might be haunted by the memory of a sweet text you received back when things seemed perfect between you and your spouse. This “hauntedness” is frustrating, but totally normal, and it will fade with time. Divorce has often been likened to experiencing a death, so it is okay to take the time to grieve.
Eventually, you will find yourself looking toward the future and feeling excited about new possibilities and new adventures. You will likely catch yourself going longer and longer periods without thinking about your spouse because you are too busy thinking about everything that lies ahead of you.
Having an experienced divorce lawyer by your side during the process can take off some of the stress and make things easier. At McKINNON LEGAL, we negotiate for your best interests on your behalf so that you can focus your energy on navigating your emotions and making your way towards your next chapter. If you are facing a family law matter, learn more about how an experienced marital and family law practitioner can help you.